Valuing Children's Voice After Separation

Written on the 3 June 2024 by Lucy Cook

Lucy Cook, our Centre Director has recent had a paper published in the Family and Relationship Services: Valued now and into the future - Peer reviewed papers from the FRSA 2024 National Conference, which we are happy to provide you access to below.
 

PRACTICE INSIGHTS
Valuing Children’s Voice After Separation
Lucy Cook, Founding Director, Penguin Parent Education Network

Introduction

‘There can be no keener revelation of a society’s soul than the way in which it treats its children.’ Nelson Mandela, Former President of South Africa

Parental separation and divorce are significant life events that can deeply impact children's wellbeing and development. Over time, processes and practices have been adopted by the family law sector to protect children, many with the goal of shielding children from the damaging effects of relationship breakdown. However, sometimes the desire to protect or shield children has resulted in silencing them. What we do not realise is that by ignoring children’s voices, the damage is already done.

Parental separation and divorce are significant life events that can deeply impact children's wellbeing and development. Over time, processes and practices have been adopted by the family law sector to protect children, many with the goal of shielding children from the damaging effects of relationship breakdown. However, sometimes the desire to protect or shield children has resulted in silencing them. What we do not realise is that by ignoring children’s voices, the damage is already done. This paper describes how Penguin Parent Education Network gives children a voice within the context of its Children’s Contact Service (CCS)1, using trauma informed practices that aim to reduce children’s anxiety. 

These practices are delivered via a child-centred 4-step process that focuses on valuing their voices and minimising trauma and anxiety surrounding a contact visit. Children often arrive at contact centres feeling disempowered, and untrusting of any adults (including Penguin supervisors) who are involved in their parents' family law matter, which can lead to a high level of anxiety. The Penguin Method addresses these presenting issues with the ultimate aim of reducing anxiety in the children prior to their first contact visit. This in turn reduces the parents’ anxiety, thus setting all up for a confident and successful visit. Over a period of 9 months, 21 families and 34 children participated in orientation that included the Penguin Method prior to starting contact visits. Penguin found that by following this process, children self-reported a significant reduction in anxiety from pre- to post- orientation. By following the Penguin Method we are setting the children up for success, setting the visit up for success and supporting both parents and children on their journey.

Download Lucy's Paper to continue reading.